Where do I belong

 I woke up dreaming about a song that doesn't exist. Maybe it's "a sign" I should be an award winning lyricist. Ha!

The song was the artist going through these montages - starting from home, a friend group, stepping in a puddle (when she really didn't want to get wet and soaking her shoes and feet and socks), feeling a little stuck and wet (somehow, my brain lingered here a bit), then bolting and deciding to go anyway, running down some sand-filled wooden box steps and running along the beach, screaming, Where do I belong! 

Where do I belonggggggg!

Just belting it louder and louder and running faster and farther away...

She screams,

God I know you can hear me, so answer pleeeeease!

Where do I belongggggg!

Where do I belongggggg!

God I know you love me, but where do I belong?

I hate talking to my mother of origin. She is just not helpful. When I ask her for help, her only answers are ask God. God, God, God. It's like the least practical advice.

Make it make sense, woman!

Today is a day I want to go back to Seattle. 

It occurred to me now that a little bit of light is being shed on the last boy entanglement. This boy is holding a flame from a 20+ year old romance. I've been there. What'd I tell you, men are more romantic than women! The level of disillusionment is fantastic! They haven't evolved from when I was 17 and doubtful to #almost40 and doubtful. They actually are getting worse because women's biology need them for baby-making.

I am hopeful that 40 years from now we will have changed the paradigm with the availability of bio-tech solutions. Women like me will raise the bar and men will have to respond to the call to BE BETTER. I think they have reached their high, and there is usually a crash. 

We will have had enough. It just takes so long for the message to spread.

So I celebrate you, Single Moms by Choice. You are the future!