Yep, it's time for another round of nasty things I'm thinking but can never say about the people around me. For the record it's 11:54p on Wednesday and I can't sleep. I don't know if it helps to get it out or try to suppress it. This is what happens when you don't talk to anyone all day.
Do you ever get the feeling you're being watched?
There was some quote I read on someone else's blog that social anxiety is playing by some rules that you don't know exist. I probably paraphrased it wrong, but you get the gist.
Some names may or may not have been changed to protect the guilty.
Mediocre White Man tells lies! That time you asked why is he saying this (obvious lie), I had to bite my tongue to avoid saying, he always tells lies! Yeah, he's been doing that since I started. Yeah, that's how he is. Yeah, that tracks. It doesn't help that he's lightly managed by Old Buddy, so she will never catch it and you will never say anything. He was somehow responsible for my training but was telling me a bunch of wrong stuff.
Kyra doesn't do work! Ok, she does work but it's shoddy at best. She said I had no filter. She always has a tone when I'm trying to get information. When other people ask her to do something, she does it. Especially the "Karens" of the world. When I ask her to do something, she give me stank face and may or may not do it. Why do I have to follow-up with this woman with 20 years of experience? But she's part of your work-family, so I can't say anything. And you certainly wouldn't come to my defense.
That dumb love fest that she has with Old Buddy is not surprising. Mediocre people love company. Is that how that saying goes?
I am truly at a loss of what is sooo great about Old Buddy because even the vendor seemed to have some sort of long lost respect and fondness for her.
Do they say things about me that you've never told me? Doubt it. I feel like you would let it leak out.
What are they saying about me now? Are you defending me or are you just letting them drag my name through the mud. I wouldn't be surprised if you were the ringleader. I hate that I'll never know.
I've been daydreaming about having a check-in where we can ask each other 10 questions and you have to tell the truth! The actual truth no corporate code and funhouse words. That would be the dream.
Yeah, really, the Team was "so psyched" for my new role that's why they didn't congratulate me or wish me well? How did that reality hit when it landed? Did you even notice? Ha!
What's it like to live in a funhouse anyway? How do you people keep up with all the lies.
What the heck was that database management meeting anyway. Why was everyone trying to gaslight me? Like Kyra, what the heck! Literally, we were on 4 different pages. Why can't people just say they don't know. Thanks for making me go through that 300 item list of documents to archive only for you to ... that's right... do nothing with it! And I can't say anything. Just let it go.
Hey, MERJ, you did work that means nothing.. just let it go!
You did work that no one else wanted to do but everyone gets the credit... just let it go!
People lie and get away with it... just let it go!
People complain, don't do work, make snide comments and still get considered for a promotion... just let it go!
You "complain" or raise issues, and you get called challenging and get assigned more work to get a free trip to the funhouse of lies and gaslighting!! Karen raises issues... nothing but high praise!!!
People benefit from your hardwork while you get shown the door... just let it go!
You're left out and plotted against... just let it go!
This is my issue with the world. Bottling it inside hurts you. Saying it outside hurts others. So you just have to let it go. How does anyone learn?
How is everyone else so good at this? Is it even worth FIRE-ing? I mean, if it's not the workplace, it's other gathering places.
How do you live your truth in a world built on lies.
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