Yes, Please Pay Me Less and Other Things

 Had a small cry a few minutes ago.

I haven't felt lonely, definitely alone but I think I'm getting close.

I think that was what led to my poor decision making with the 40 year old. I lost a lot of resolve and desire to "do the right thing" after my aunt died. I was already slipping so it's not entirely that moment, but it was pivotal.

I set up the Wyze cam today. It was both easy and annoying. It was just so hot. Fall revives me. Heat kills my vibe man. But I did it. I think I may need to adjust the angle because ideally i want to see the person walking up but you pretty much just see their head looking down. You really wouldn't be able to identify a face. But I'm happy anyway.

The floor stopper didn't really work but I improvised and laid it flat under the door. That should help close some of the gap I hope. There was fat juicy bug greeting me this morning. It was still alive so my bug spray is not working anymore. I guess next summer I'll try the white bottle of Home Defense. 

The blue spray was making the back of my neck tingle and I only sprayed the outside doorway. So even that little bit was making me feel weird.

That seems little but it took most of the morning.

Went to laundromat since I was already hot and sweaty. I bribed myself by saying just prioritize the bedding. I will have autumn even if it's only in my mind. I could've sworn the weekend was going to be cool but it's only getting hotter!

Goodbye, September!  My numbers are up from 3 months ago but down from August. The robo advisor is down from 3 months ago. I don't know why that thing doesn't mirror the others. 

I think I decided to go to CVS Minute Clinic in October when I get the other test done. I'll just make a day of it since I'll be out anyway.

Just a couple more guys this week on Hinge have asked me to physically go out. So I'm thinking more about getting vaccinated this year instead of 2022. I don't know though because when I broke my rules before, I ended up with heartache. 

I think I just want to wait until things are more normal. I don't want to use the vaccine as a reason to be reckless.  Yeah. 

I don't know what the point of getting the wellness check is anyway. Who wants to know they're sick. I think it'll probably be free anyway so there goes trying to spend my $120 FSA dollars. Decidedly, I'm not doing FSA next year. 

Oh bury the lede. 

Yesterday and the day before was such a whirlwind. Big Job offered to phone screen me. I thought it would be a simple HR screen. It was not! It was still with HR but she asked a lot of in depth questions. It did not go as well as I prepared for.  When she asked about salary expectations, I heard myself asking what the range was. And she gave it to me! It's $160 to 190k. I was floored and automatically felt too big for my britches.  Like the spectrum adjacent gal I am, when she asked again for a number, I said $160....err... to $170k. Facepalm. I already had to talk myself into even asking for $160k so my brain just could not jump to something more reasonable like $170 to $175k. 

I was mad checking email today...well only 2 or 3 times... to see if they wrote back. Nada. It's okay actually.

Other than that, another really great day!