Catfish Kate is at it again!

 Obviously the middle of the night is when I have my best-worst ideas! This night was no different. After awaking in the middle of the night to check if Dapple aka Last Hope had texted me, I was not surprised to find the answer is No. Remember he was more than willing to pursue Catfish Kate even offering to call her twice. Not so with me.

No surprises there. I also checked my new profile and discovered no notifications. Womp, womp. Logical Brain knows it's because I'm not the current standard of beauty. But Wishful Brain is like maybe it's because you're too smart, obviously too pretty, too far away. Who wants to start something long distance. Dapple explicitly said he didn't, although it was looking like he was going to with Catfish Kate.

Well wanting to leave no doubt, I created a new profile. While I was tempted to use the old photos even I was weary of getting caught doing that. I mean what are the consequences really. So I downloaded some more vague photos at 3a and created a new Kate profile. I was going to change her name, but what's the fun in that.

And instead of making up all new stuff I input all the variables from my profile that was causing me doubt to include my fancy school and my out of town status. Wouldn't you know within MINUTES of creating the profile, I had 3 matches. And this was about 5a EST, so about 2a PST.

What does MERJ have- goose eggs.

So it's not the distance. It's not my fancy school, or weird job. 

It's just me. 

I know if I ever seriously pursue online dating again, I will always use a catfish profile to calibrate expectations.

Eventhough I know the answer to my dating woes I still lurk on Reddit from time to time. One poster said it best as to why they were resigning from online dating - my profile is not attractive enough for online dating. I think that's a very diplomatic way of stating it.

I know I'm amazing, but I'm not a good fit for this mode of dating. The data is in. The numbers never lie! It gives me a little bit of hope that long distance isn't this big scary thing that no one wants to do. They just don't want to do it with me. It almost makes me want it more. I don't have to be the easy girl unless I reach that level of desperation (again). 

I don't know if I'll delete my profile tonight or wait till Monday. Part of me is thinking of texting Dapple. I know, I know. In my Wishful Brain, I say something like let's try for 90 days and then make a decision if we want to date or part ways. I think I've been watching too much TV or working too many corporate jobs. 

Part of me is curious who will even bite. I did change my name back to a placeholder name though (by way of some protection for little MERJ). Oh well. 

In real life, I got an email to volunteer with Science Olympiad this year! One will be virtual and the other will be in person (but hopefully outdoors). I went ahead and signed up without a second look!

In signing up I was offered some vouchers for Hello Fresh. I could get a week of meals for $40. I was so close to doing it... but I don't know. It's not the price as much as... I technically have food here that I don't want to make, so will new food I don't want to make make a difference? I am trying to say Yes more to spending. We shall see.