Hey, friends! Last night I was perusing some old docs - mostly journals to myself. I had made a list of 30 items that described what I wanted my life to look like over the next 30 years. I did this as I was turning 30, so about 10 years ago.
TEN YEARS AGO!
It was interesting to see that most of my wishlist is very much the same. But a little disheartening how little progress I've made and that I'm still struggling with the same things.
It's funny how my current trials feel so brand new but they've been with me for at least 10 years and I would imagine even longer. I had stumbled across a 5 year plan from 10 years ago as well and it has much the same as I want for myself now. Yet, each time I make a plan it feels like I'm just coming up with it!
Struggles - making decisions and relationships with other people. At that time I had friend dust, now there's nothing there really. Even 10 years ago, I was telling myself not to see my family more often than every 2 years. Even 10 years ago, I was warning myself not to get caught up chasing old friends/ flings. This is still something I struggle with today. I just had a much harder time making friends in adulthood than I ever imagined.
Strangely, my only financial notes were - create a vacation savings jar and win the lottery. Not sure what that tells me. I think "richness" felt like a fantasy. Not sure. But luckily, that is not a struggle. I think either I was confident in my money earning abilities (which doesn't ring true) or it was not enough of a problem or it was too big of a problem that trying to solve it seemed futile. I think maybe it just felt like a universal problem, not a unique problem like dealing with my family or trying to understand my friendships.
Some of the other things that are still true-
- different ideas to boost mood - exercise, get a hobby, leave the house, don't fall into social pressures of what you 'should be doing' (fail, fail, fail on all counts!)
- struggling with faith and what I believe
- struggling with purpose
- I had at least half a dozen items listed for diet and exercise and my relationship with sugar
Luckily, weight doesn't seem to be an issue 10 years later, but my diet and exercise still leave a lot to be desired. But I think my motivation for improvement is changing. I was very scared of diabetes and there was probably some vanity involved. But now, it's more about mood and overall wellbeing. On the other hand, I care a little bit less about how much sugar I intake.
What stuck out most were my notes on decision-making:
- Don't try to achieve unpredictable outcomes... (Boom! And here I thought I just came up with that the last few years... I knew this all along it seems!)
- Are you trying to achieve a fantasy outcome? And you will just ignore all the bumps as something you'll get over (This!)
- And just overall how much I struggle when I can't get my first choice. The other choices just don't compare so I'm stuck trying to figure out which sucky thing will suck the least. Another note from 10 years ago - don't try to predict how something will make you feel.
So yeah, I can admit there is quite a lot of fantasy outcomes built into the move to Philadelphia. I'm not sure how I think I will suddenly build community and live happily ever after. So I rationalize that the move will at least help me spend down my money. I've run quite a few scenarios and looked at the FIRE chart for withdrawal rate a bit. I realized I really have 15 years left to live on a higher income because now the default plan will be just to live out my 'olden day's in a 55 and over community. So even if I lose my high paying job the second I move, I should still be okay. I would just live out my $60k year until my lease is up. And if I don't find another job, I'll move. But likely, instead of immediately choosing to retire early, I'll try to find a call center job and still prioritize living fat/chubby fire. I think it's fatFIRE for me at $60k, considering that's 3x my leanFIRE number. I think the goal that is achievable is living off $60k/yr... getting all the conveniences and luxuries - a cool apartment, a parking space, just any luxury or convenience I can fit into $60k/yr and not thinking twice about it.
But I'm still letting the idea marinate. Still getting comfortable letting go of my FIRE net. Notably, my net worth (ie, assets for me) reached an all time high of about $560k yesterday. That's up $60k from when I reached FIRE 1 year ago about this time. I've put in quite a bit more money since then but oh well. My FIRE stash is completely funded outside of my regular spending so that's pretty awesome and I'm also pretty close to having the $500k in all investments, which is also pretty rad!
So this definitely helps. The other thing about Philadelphia is the rent prices there are all over the place so I think even if I needed to come down from $2500/mon to $1800/mon, I could find something. I looked at buying but home value is also all over the place, so I don't know. But more and more I run the numbers, there's a good chance of living off $60k pre-RE and after I reach 1 million. I just don't see myself living in a fast paced city in old age, so it's very likely I will return to the south, and go even deeper south if I have to.
Now that I've added that lever to my arsenal, I am starting to feel more confident about potentially moving to a higher cost of living city.
Right now some objectives (yet to be ordered by priority):
- leaving NC/ lifestyle change
- upgrading my lifestyle (ie, spending more for convenience, upgrades, luxury)
- more social activities with people my age
- spending down my cash
These might all be saying the same thing, who knows.
Admittedly, I plotted out a daily time diary and it still included a slot for quality time with a partner. I just want the experience of playing life with a partner. It's like a game that seems more interesting with a partner. The conversations and challenges seem interesting.
In other news, Happy 1 year anniversary to me! I reached LeanFIRE around this time last year!! Woot!!
It's wild reading all my notes about what I would be doing in 2023. Most of it had me quitting my job and ending my life in some fashion. Both of those things are still in the pipeline but just not right now. The more things change, huh.
Also, I got an interview invite to one of the remote programs. Not the Tulsa one though. It's way down south and not a place I'd go. It seemed like an easy no. Butttt...I mean it's an opportunity for FREE HOUSING! My lifelong dream! That's harder to say no than I thought. The way I see it - I may not love it here, and I definitely won't love it going further south....but at least there I'd get free housing for a year!
So I'll take the interview. And on Tuesday, I plan on following up with Tulsa Remote. Casually, I'm saying to myself if I get the Tulsa gig, I'll just mosey on up to Seattle afterward and live out the next 5 years there. Where before I was saying, it'd be an easy yes to keeping my house for a year and likely coming back to NC after a year in Tulsa.
So yeah stay tuned.
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