Silly mistakes and a re-challenge

 Ugh, I forgot to add timelines to my last email. In my defense, my team mate was supposed to send the email. And I was already nervous because she logged off for the day in what felt like an unfinished conversation.

Our big boss of the project seems to remember little mistakes. I don't want any trouble.

Luckily, after this, I shouldn't have too much more to do with this project.

I hate that when I was dreading my meeting for today, I started to think how much longer I needed to keep working. It's not a huge ask at all. And it's not as though I wasn't prepared. But I just was not looking forward to it.

I've been living on easy mode the last couple of weeks, and I like it there. I mean after I sent the last email, I mostly just have to sit and wait for feedback, so I technically have the rest of the day for less focused work.

But yet, even these short bursts of work seem a bit much. Working a full work week just takes so much out of me. I blame half of it on non-COVID, ie whatever mysterious illness I seem to be plagued with that is still lingering. 

But I'm so glad this is about to be out the door. The kickoff for my next project starts Thursday while I'm finishing this one up.

Luckily, I had in my Life Plan for this year to focus on work, so it's not as though there's something else I need to be doing. Honestly, it helps to have this written down because I can remind myself that this is all I need to be doing right now.

But yeah, I wish I wouldn't dread things or at least not dread them and then also re-challenge what I want my life to look like everytime. 

So in the re-imagining of my life, I seem to be heavily flirting with the idea of calling it in after 10 years of work as a pharmacist. Which will put me at around 2025. 

I can't believe it's already been 7+ years. Wow! She old!

On the slow days, I think...yeah, I could make it to 1 million dollars without trying. But on the harder days, I wonder if I can make it 2 more years.

Luckily, I've decided not to plan my life more than 1 year in advance. So all I have to do really is make it to tomorrow. Which I can definitely do!

I question the wisdom of putting me on such a high profile project. But here we are. 

Accomplishments:

- Not abruptly quitting my job to avoid the meeting this morning

- Getting a lot of my deliverable done before today

- Finally activating my new debit card

- following up with Landing - allegedly they'll confirm my 1 week reservation next weekend; I didn't have any brain cells left to make alternate plans

- Um, randomly saw what looked like a good deal to Seattle and booked 1 way for May

- Getting enough rewards points to qualify for a free happy meal (glad I thought this out before the time came)

- Responding to email about cousin trip

- Not messaging people because I think I can handle it (I can't!!!)

- responding to the lawyer about the will and trust documents (I don't want to go through with it)

Side note. While looking for a picture for a work thing, I came across a screenshot of one of the last messages from Sean. I almost forgot his name. Wow, what an imagination I had. His message clearly stated he didn't think there was enough there for a friendship or relationship. Somehow I only focused on his words about me not being there. So suffice to say, for as long as I can remember, that dream is dead. 

Hmm, I have been wondering why I'm even going back to Seattle. The dating dream is dead and buried. But I can still pursue the lakehouse dream. Right now, I'll probably go for Summer session, but not so sure about the Fall. 

I want to go somewhere cool with a lot of good places to eat and walkabout. Landing doesn't have any listings in Portland, Maine, or I'd go there. 

Can I just say how much I enjoyed drinking my fruit punch soda and eating chips the last few days. It's so sweet and tasty!

That's all for now. 1 more month till bonus day!