my birthday is less than 2 months away.
i went to sleep last night with a lump in my throat and i woke up this morning with it.
i'm anxious about something but i'm not quite sure what.
one of my last conversations was about a trip over seas. it wasn't really part of my travel plans or budget for this year, but then I thought why not. it's about 6k more than i thought i'd want to spend this year. so i flashed through some thoughts of increasing my yearly spend from 40k to around 50k...yowzers...
but then i thought...do i really want to go? honestly, not really.
would it make a few members of my family happy - WITHOUT A DOUBT.
spending money to make other people happy...is a new concept to me.
so that's where most of the angst lies.
i haven't really hung out much with my neighbor since thanksgiving.
and i'm surprisingly okay...now.
it was rough at first...but i've gotten into the groove of things.
anxious feelings led me to try to file my taxes with the information i have which is nothing...womp, womp.
overall, still happy. really want some chocolate cookies or rice krispie treats with chocolate chips.
not sure what i'm eating this week.
it's weird to not have to worry about waking up tomorrow.
i thought i needed to fill the time...but now i'm wondering if want to volunteer and play bells...etc...
i feel that pull on my time, and i'm starting to resent it...
well as i have to keep reminding myself....this is the transition year...mistakes will be made....
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