ooooo, scary
got bubble guts trying to negotiate a meeting time with my boss
i've got to remind myself every morning to suck it up
i'm reminded of a blog post i read once where the guy was trying to hang on until his next big payout but his mental health couldn't take it
i wonder if that's me
is it worth it
the thing is...i've lost track of what i'm trying to achieve with both gigs...
it's not wholly monetary because i am mostly waiting on investment returns to take me to my next FI number...
so what am i even doing...
i don't know...
for now...trying to collect this paycheck
..i'm proud of myself for sticking up for myself in the smallest of ways...
...priorities for the win...i have to protect my reliable source of income..
..it occurred to me that the task i was afraid of might be even smaller than anticipated because the project timeline has been pushed to 2025-2026...which means less work for me...
...so if i can just babysit the project until then...i should be golden...slap a smile on my face and keep it moving..up my medication, increase my therapy...take all the vacations...get extra snuggles...
...ideally find an easy job so i can roll off this one...the only thing i can think is...the benefit of staying with j1 is that i can find things internally and it won't be a cold app...cuz the data 'don't lie'...
so there's that...
off to enjoy my very pleasant weekend...besos!
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