My Early Retirement Journey: Fall 2018

Showing posts with label Fall 2018. Show all posts

I might move to Spain. Here's why.

While I boldly published my intent to Sabbatical in 2020, I've had many more iterations of life-outside-of-the-workforce since then. Lately I've been giving the Spanish teaching program more thought. If you're not familiar with it, check out this post.

After a less than ideal day at work, I have now convinced myself this is a viable option for a structured sabbatical. Here's why...

1, I will have worked 5 years.

If I do the program in the 2020-2021 school year, I will have five years of work under my belt. This is good because even if I only do the program for one year, I'll have five years of history to show me I can make it another five years. Most early retirees seem to be able to FIRE in ten years or less. Plus with five years of work, that's more time to save more money. That last one is one reason why I'm not trying to do the program in the 2019-2020 school year. I'm not ready to fast forward leaving work without a firm plan in hand; although my Monday mornings might tell a different story.

2, It's something to look forward to.

Even though it's far off into the future, the thought of it has added a bit more focus to my time in the workforce. Now that there's a possible end in sight, I can just focus on one more year (+ 9 months). Plus there are decisions I have to make before then that will add momentum. For example, in July 2019, I'll have to start thinking about how long to renew my 2019 to 2020 lease. With Spain in mind, I'll likely need a shorter lease. I'm also thinking of going by my new name with my 'new life', so I'll need to update my passport before Jan 2020, maybe in Sept 2019.

With the urgency placed on 2019, I feel more compelled to have some noteworthy experiences. When it feels like time is running out, I tend to want to take advantage of whatever it is I feel I might lose - making better use of my free time; seeing more parts of my state; maybe finally going to a state park, to name a few.

3, What do I have to lose?

I don't think I'm going to be more eager to have an adventure in my forties than in my thirties. So if not now, then when? Really, what do I have to lose?

Money. The most obvious thing is money. I won't be working at my current income for part of 2020 and maybe all of 2021. But so what? From Jan 1 to Sept 15, 2020, I could still max out my 401k and Roth IRA. With today's limits, that's $25k. Not the $45k I am hoping to save in 2019, but it's still something. If I can at least contribute the max on my 401k, I'll feel some semblance of being on track to some version of early retirement (ER). As for 2021, it's undecided. Ideally, I'd love to come back in Sep 2021 and resume at least my current salary. Of note, in 2015 when I started my current job, I started in Sep and netted a gross amount of $25,000. So there's opportunity there to save at least some portion of that in 2021. Maybe even see if I can do 100% contribution per pay period to 401k...that would be awesome!

Worst case scenario. The worst case scenario is I have a horrible time. I get placed in a horrible school with horrible kids and a horrible apartment. Barring death or permanent injury, it wouldn't be forever; I would get over it and never want to visit Europe again. Oh, well. Lots of people never go to Europe. If it's truly horrible, I think it would make me eager to return to the US to my easy, less adventurous life (i.e. my life now). It would certainly make me think twice about retiring early abroad. I would appreciate the US more. I do appreciate it now as I recognize that my life is pretty easy here in terms of convenience and access to just about everything. Hence, why it's easier to complain but make no change. In the end, if it's a terrible experience, it'll be a nice reassurance that I'm not really missing much.

Best case scenario. On the other hand, let's say it doesn't suck. I think the potential to have a really good time is high. Let's say I go through with this and a joyful or at least adventurous spirit is awakened. Under the pressure of a one year stint, I could see myself more compelled to take advantage of the proximity to other cultures. I like a good deal even if I didn't know I wanted it.

Once upon a time, people used to fascinate me before I tired of and stopped suffering them. I enjoyed learning new things and learning about different walks of life. This may be an opportunity to see if that part of me still lives or even wants to come out to play. I could see at least a dozen countries, if I wanted. I could learn Spanish (again) or even speak it with some native fluency. I could try new water sports (thank you, Escape to the Continent). Maybe I'll even develop a hobby outside of television watching. Maybe I could go to Kenya and learn to paddle board (again thank you, Escape to the Continent). I can visit Croatia, Portugal, or if I'm feeling really bold Kenya. Croatia and Portugal are on my list for possible ER locales. I hope to be inspired by people choosing other paths of life. Right now I'm surrounded by the predictable: marriage, house, kids. #Notaboutthatlife

Additionally, it'll be fun to be a new person. I'll be a single 30-something living abroad. I can be who ever I want to be. Yes, I have heard the saying 'wherever you are, there you'll be', but people re-invent themselves all the time! I've been a country bumpkin from the Mid-west. I was a cool, savvy metropolitan girl for a stint. Then I was a breezy California girl who went hiking and to movie premieres. My latest life as a meek Southern girl is not my favorite, but I've managed to maintain that life for 7 years. Why wouldn't I want to be someone else for a year! Most of all, I think I would really enjoy just being an American (no hyphens or subcategories).

4, Why this program anyway?

That's a good question. There are at least two other widely known sponsored English-teaching programs (JET and EPIK), but this one seems the least stringent. It's a part-time gig with assistant responsibilities vs leading a class. I think I'll benefit from the looser structure and three-day weekends; the other programs don't offer that.

Why a program at all? Well, because I don't have that much wanderlust. I'm not the traveler that prefers to go off the beaten path. I like touristy things; I like things that are well established. I don't usually talk to the locals when I travel. In the past, I've treated traveling as a checklist and photo-op. I don't think that part of me has changed. So if I don't have a reason to be in Spain, I couldn't see myself going or staying for a year. The program provides a compelling reason and a task that can be completed. That's the way I'm wired.

The Plan.

TBD. I am etching it out now. But as I may have eluded to to, I would hope to save 10k for expenses for the school year. The program provides a 600 Euro/mon stipend that I would want to use just for housing. I would want to max out my 401k and Roth IRA the months leading up to my departure. If I can find a job that starts the Sept after the school year, I'd like to come back to the US and finish working and saving for FIRE. I'm hoping between now and then, I'll transition into different responsibilities at work (per my professional development plan) that will make me more marketable upon my return. What helped me think this is doable is at least 2 employees on my team have returned after leaving. The most recent one was gone 13 months and resumed his last position.

So what do you think? I may do this, or this may be the last time I even think about this! C'est la vie...

Recently inspired by: A Purple Life

1 Year Later

With the end of year comes many opportunities for reflection. Today I'm looking back at my first year of My Early Retirement Journey - both virtually and in real life. It's the first year I tracked my income and expenses. It's the first year I maxed out my 401k. It's the first year I invested in a brokerage account (and subsequently lost money). It's the first year I followed other personal finance (PF) blogs. It's also my first year blogging (update included).

Tracking my income and expenses
I tried at least three different spreadsheets this year. I eventually defaulted to the Google Sheets for tracking my income and expenses because it was portable via an internet connection. I use a home-made Excel sheet for tracking my savings and investments.

My issue with Google sheets was that the default sheet had way too many categories for my spending habits. So for 2019, I decided to stick with it but streamlined the categories going from about 100 line items to just a few categories.

Doing it the way I did in 2018 I knew would be useful because I wanted to track transportation and housing costs for future use and help justify my decision regarding both - own a car, but not own a house.

Using less categories in 2019 will make it easier to trend broad categories especially since I have some version of early retirement where I just make a run for it. Thus I need a round number of what is needed to cover basic expenses in my head. Right now that number is 18-20k/year. Making my FIRE number = $500k.

Tracking income and expenses is helpful and to a certain extent necessary but not always enjoyable. Because my expenses don't vary that much, I don't see myself updating my spreadsheet anymore than quarterly, and I think in the future I could do annually, if at all. But for now, I'll keep updating semi-regularly.

Read more: 11 Months of Income and Expenses in 2018

Single Girl Money | Dec 2018 Income and Expenses Update

Single Girl Money | Dec 2018 Savings and Investment Update

Trends

From the looks of it I saved as much as I had in 2016 (50%+) before I was even pursing FIRE intentionally. No surprises there, I suppose. I didn’t change much since then. However, it was a curious experiment to see what I really was spending my money on. I like data so that was beneficial in that aspect. No real surprises overall. It was nice to have a sum total of what I spent on Aunty MERJ ($5k+).

I noticed too I was not spending as much on groceries and eating out as I thought. There is probably room for improvement but not enough to warrant any drastic life changes. I recognize that food/dining out and cable are my everyday luxuries. Conceivably there are probably a few categories in which I can trim back a bit, but that would require quite a bit of effort both in thought and execution. While it may save me a bit of money it wouldn't really up my timeline, but I could be convinced otherwise.

Implications

If you recall, I stumbled upon FIRE because around this time last year (2017) I was really wondering do I really have to do this job for the next 30 years? The answer: NO.

I could reasonably escape in 15 years (with just maxing out 401k contributions) or less. Better. But when I did that fateful Google search in Dec 2017, I was looking for a now solution. Fifteen years just isn’t soon enough.

In fact, I originally thought I can save half my salary for 10 years and take a break for 10 years and then just repeat. FIRE has presented me options but hasn't changed that line of thinking completely. It's still in the back of my mind. As I type this, I still don't know which way I'm definitely going to go. The effects of compound interest require a longer time horizon than my eagerness allows. I’m still looking for a secret door and ultimately I haven’t found it. So on the leaving the workforce NOW front, I’m still mentally eons away. So, takeout and tv it is.

Blogging
Subscribers. Even on my highest pageview day, I got maybe one or two new subscribers. In total, the addition of the pop-up gave me nine new subscribers over two months. It's better than any other two month time frame before the pop-up but it's still a pretty low conversion rate. Also, it’s pretty annoying and I don’t like having to worry about maintaining the subscriber list. I got rid of the pop-up (and ads on the sidebar).

Pinterest. Pretty done with creating pins. It's time consuming and I don't enjoy doing them right now. At first I was seeing no traffic, but I have seen some traffic year to date. I have about 100 old pins that get pinned daily via Google calendar. It's actually more work to stop them, so I'll just leave them.

Submissions. My best traffic days have been after a guest post publishes. It is by far easier when something I've already published is reprinted on another site such as The Financial Diet or Women Who Money. Most notable guest post was my feature on Think Save Retire. It produced my highest pageview day to date - over 1k pageviews. I have one previously published post left that I plan to submit soon to some external sites but likely not many more in 2019.

Facebook. Facebook is a fun indoor activity for the most part; I feel no pressure to heavily market blog there. I have come to appreciate the groups on my lazy weekends. Chiming in on the group posts reminds me of the original AOL chat rooms. I miss those.

Twitter. Twitter is easily forgettable. I’ll keep the automatic posts through WordPress. Not sure how much engagement I’m willing to commit to on that platform. TBD. It's not something I was using prior to blogging.

Wednesday Weekly. I started a weekly roundup a few months in. I'll likely not continue the Wednesday Weekly roundup in 2019 although I do like sharing things I read. I suppose I may do a sprinkling of roundups here and there if some interesting posts pop-up on my radar.

Comics. I do find myself wishing I could draw. I had at least one good idea for a comic that was too difficult to figure out how to illustrate with the available templates. I really like the comics and I think if I can find an easier way to get my ideas across, I could flesh that out more. Those are fun.

Inner Blogger dilemma. I have mixed feelings being back on Wordpress. It was the promise of monetization that sold me. Since that's not a salient goal of mine at the moment, it seems kind of pointless to be on Wordpress. (Read: I've made no money and I'm tired of trying.) Plus there was just less pressure on Blogger. I now desire a simpler layout. I'm even getting tired of selecting images to go with each post. So some days, yes, I do regret leaving Blogger.

2018 Stats (via Jetpack for Wordpress and or Google Analytics)

Views: 17,010

Sessions: 6,695 (Oct = 1,433, Nov = 1,157)

Jetpack Top Referrers (views): Rockstar Directory (335), Pinterest (321), Search Engines (318), thinksaveretire.com (285), Facebook (209), Twitter (188)

Google Analytics Top Referrers (views): thinksaveretire.com (1,035), treadlightlyretireearly.com (801), Rockstar Directory (543), financesmiths.com (535), Pinterest (429), strugglingtobedebtfree.blogspost.com (356), Facebook (292)

Email subscribers: about 20 (4 on Wordpress, 8 on MailerLite, 7 on Feedburner, 1 on MailChimp)

Milestones. I've been blogging since February, so technically that puts me about 10 months into this foray. My milestones with the blog are as follows: quite a few guest posts on other sites; hitting 1,000 users in a month; Rockstar newsletter feature; 3 featured posts on The Financial Diet; someone actually approaching me to submit to their site. And overall connecting with a few other bloggers and sharing my story and reading theirs! I'm here for the stories and that's been wonderful!

If there are any highlights I missed or lingering questions, let me know in the comments below.

Single Girl Money | Dec 2018 Income and Expenses Update

I sort of cheated and provided a thorough eleven-month update of income and expenses earlier this month. That one did not have charts! Thus I present to you my fourth quarter or end of year update on my income and expenses for 2018.

Income

My income is primarily from my day job except for this spring when I dabbled in a side hustle. I did not love it.

2018 Total Take Home Pay: $56,960 (rounded)

Monthly Average: $4,750/mon

2018 Total Take Home Pay + 401k deductions: $75,460 (rounded)

Expenses

I used Google sheets to track my expenses all year for the first time. I included Savings and Investments as a line item just to account for where all the money was going. There's a bit of a dip in Savings and Investments in December because I had maxed out my 401k in November. I don't recommend that because I didn't get my company match for the month I didn't contribute anything.

October had a bit of a credit from Aunty MERJ because I was paid back for some of her expenses I covered. Total automated Savings and Investments for 2018 was $41,154.

Above are my monthly expenses without including Savings and Investments as a line item. Home is noticeably higher in December because I prepaid January 2019 due to some administrative issues with the leasing office. Any other questions, ask in the comments below.

2018 Totals

	Total
Aunty MERJ	$5,251	$438/mon
Debt	$6,265	$522
Entertainment	$369	$31
Everyday	$2,959	$247
Gifts/Tithe	$406	$34
Health/medical	$2,087	$174
Home	$13,097	$1,091
Technology	$280	$23
Transportation	$1,558	$130
Travel	$520	$43
Utilities	$458	$38
Other	$148	$12

Total 2018 Expenses: $32,917

Projected 2018 Expenses: $30,000

Difference: -$2,917

Projected 2018 Monthly Expenses: $2,500/mon

Actual 2018 Monthly Expenses (avg): $2743/mon

Difference: -$243/mon

Notes

Even with the addition of Aunty MERJ's expense and more than a few health appointments, I think I did pretty good this year. My projected annual expense was $30,000. I spent $32,917. My three largest expense categories were: Home ($13,097), Student Loans ($6,265), and Aunty MERJ ($5,251). So 2018 Expenses - Home - Student Loans - Aunty MERJ is $32,917 - 13,097 - 6,265 - 5,251 = $8,304. In early retirement, I would not live in such an expensive apartment; I would not have such a high student loan payment; and Aunty MERJ's expenses would be minimal. Thus, with basic annual expenses coming in just around $8,000/yr, I think it just might be possible to live off $18-20k/yr in early retirement.

Savings Rate

A firm tenet in FIRE is recognizing and increasing your savings rate. Tracking income minus expenses, here is what the data reveals.

For the third quarter, I was fortunate enough to maintain a savings rate greater than 50% across all three months. My average savings rate for 2018 was 57%.

I don't do a zero dollar budget, so how much did I really save? Depends on how you calculate it. If I do Savings = Income - Expenses, I get about $42,500 in savings or a 56% savings rate. If I do Savings = Automatic deposits to 401k, regular savings, and brokerage account, I get about $41,100 in savings or a 54% savings rate. And if I do the average of monthly savings rate, I get a 57% savings rate. So, I'll just pick an unscientific estimated savings rate of 55%. It matters not in the end.

I did some quick scratch calculations of my savings rate through the years, just using old W-2s and Jan and Dec bank statements to get a basic idea of how I did when I was less intentional about my finances. Here's what I found. Again, these are rough estimates.

2016: $34,350 (savings)/ $65,770 (rounded net pay) = 52%

2017: $17,000 (savings)/ $70, 420 (rounded net pay) = 24%

2018: Estimated savings rate = 55%

I think that's it. Questions or comments? How did your 2018 go?

Single Girl Money | Dec 2018 Savings and Investment Update

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays. I ain't got no friends, so I thought I might as well post this now. In case you’re just joining us, here’s a little bit about me. I am a single 30-something, openly Christian, hesitantly immigrant-y, human woman. I love watching TV while eating takeout, and I want to retire early. I currently work as a consultant in a tele-health call center making around $40/hr. I started my professional life in 2015 at the ripe ole age of 31 after a few false starts. I spent 2016 paying off about $10,000 worth of credit card debt. I spent 2017 paying off about $20,000 in private student loans; I still have about $300,000 in federal student loans for which I am currently on an income-based repayment plan for the next 25 years, give or take. I started really getting into savings and investing late 2017 when I stumbled upon the FIRE (financial independence, retire early) community. In 2018, I made the decision to try to save for a sabbatical and maybe if all goes well continue the journey to early retirement. Along this journey, I give all sorts of updates, just like this one.

This is the December 2018 Update of my savings and investments balances, i.e. my personal capital. I don’t call it net worth because my massive student loan debt keeps me at a negative net worth and frankly that’s discouraging.

I am getting a little faster at Excel, so this update did not take quite as long to chart as my September 2018 Savings and Investment Update. We’ll utilize a similar structure here as well. Let’s get into it!

Let’s quickly recall some budget items:

2018 Savings goal: $37,000/yr (2017: no goal)
Monthly savings contributions: $3115/mon

Investments

My projected investment goal for the end of 2018 was $90,200. I contributed as planned, but I lost a significant chunk of my contributions as of 12/20/2018. It kind of sucked honestly, and it made me doubt this investing thing. I had been planning to update my stock allocation since my first quarter update, but since it was doing well, I didn't feel as compelled. Once I saw the loss, I got a little more motivated. This is NOT what you are supposed to do, but I did. My brokerage's advice blog said not to react emotionally to market fluctuations, but if you do, then do half of what you want to do. I heeded that advice. Both my 401k and brokerage accounts were allocated at 90/10 stock/bond. I changed my brokerage to the recommended 68/32 allocation (based on an early retirement age of 42).

That being said, you'll notice the dip in my investment balance.

Investment Losses - $10,000

It's been a hard pill to swallow. By my calculations, I've lost about $10,000 in four months. This is a lot considering I just started and it seems as though people with much larger investment portfolios haven't lost as much proportionally.

Investment Balance (08/30/18): $83,981

Contributions (Sep to Dec 2018): $9,956 (not including employer contributions)

Investment Balance (12/20/18): $83,815

Savings and Investments

When you add in my Safety Net Fund + Regular Savings and Checking, my savings and investment balance is bumped up a bit.

Thoughts

My savings goal was $37,000 this year, I did contribute at least that much, but because of market losses, that is not necessarily reflected in the end of year balance.

For some perspective, here's how far I've come.

Dec 2017 (investments only): $51,333

Dec 2018 (investments only): $83,815

Difference: $32,482 (contributions of at least $37,401)

This is actually a little bit less than where I was at my September 2018 update. Womp, womp. I still have about $5,000 in savings that need to be transferred to my investment account, but I'm holding on to it for now until I get used to the loss. And as I have all year, I still have about 1 year of expenses as a safety net, in case of job loss or if I lose my mind and make a run for it!

So that was 2018, my first year in FIRE, my first year blogging about FIRE and my first year with a defined savings goal. How did your 2018 go?

Musings over my holiday break.

Just a smattering of my thoughts during my holiday hiatus!

Wed, Nov 14 – It’s been a pretty low key week. Work is still busy, but manageable. Calls are steady but I’m not as affected, I suppose. Got so excited with only 1.5 months left in the year (50-ish days or so), I started plotting next year’s budget for target expenses and target savings. I think I might be able to eek out 45k in savings. I used the generic salary estimator.

I wanted to wait until the end of 2019 to see my true expenses in this my first year tracking, but I got too excited! Currently, I am allegedly trying to spend 30k in expenses, but with 2019, I am shooting for 26k. If it starts to feel too tight, I can always adjust, but it will be cool to save 45k. I did some quick math a couple weekends ago, and I think I hit 50% savings rate in 2016 before I even knew about FIRE. So even if I don’t get to 45k (i.e. if it’s too much pressure), 50% savings (about $34k) is still pretty amazing!

Wed, Nov 21-Had an I-love-my-life moment last night! I am happiest with sunny weather and a cool breeze, juicy take-out and a TV marathon waiting. I can’t believe tomorrow is Thanksgiving. I’ve had a few nice friends-givings in the past. Do I miss my friends? I can’t decide. Tested the waters a few times this year and the jury’s still out. Desire to share my blog from people from my past has lessened.

Speaking of the blog, even though I’m supposed to be on hiatus I have still been checking the email and stats. I know, ugh. Oh well. I keep trying to set milestones and goals to hit.

I’ll be turning 35 in March and it seems like a good inflection point. I want to have all these things to show for it, and I do... but it’s not the normal things: marriage, baby, house. So then it makes me think I have nothing to show for it. Sometimes I wish I wanted those things just to make the passage of time more memorable and “normal.” Otherwise I feel sort of aimless. But I know it’s because I have different aims, namely not those things. I just don’t know what I’m moving towards, but when I look around no one is moving toward anything. Yet they seem so satisfied with that.

Put wings in the Crockpot before work. I hope they are delicious. So much for meat-free Wednesdays. Sorry, God. Sometimes I think life would make more sense if I didn’t believe in God. I don’t think I would be as disappointed.

My latest life plan outside of joining the circus is to apply for a language learning fellowship. I think I would enjoy that. Quick search showed you sort of still need to be in college. Womp, womp. I think what I am realizing after three years of searching is that when I’m compelled enough, I’ll make the next step. The searching is just causing for-nothing anxiety. It’s like forcing myself to floss nightly or clean once a week. Good in theory, but I’m at the point in my life where I’m more motivated by necessity. And then someone at work mentioned they were laid off from their last job and jobs in our field are hard to come by. I don’t 100% believe that, but it’s not unreasonable to think that.

Fri, Nov 23 -I remember a time when we used to get up early to go Black Friday shopping. Those were fun days. I don’t do it now because I have nothing to shop for. It was fun though. I try to muster something I might want when I start seeing the commercials, but so far have come up with nothing. Have been thinking about a new countertop oven but really don’t want to have to read anymore reviews or spend any time looking for “the best one.”

Work today. Came up with yet another new life plan. This time, I work for two more years. Then relax for 10 years. That was 9a. By 11a it was back to work until Jan or March then relax for 1 year. Oy ve!

Tues, Nov 27- All the things! Read 50 Shades of Grey. Wow! No words, but so many thoughts! Got some new pants. I couldn’t fit into any of my old ones and there is a bit of a chill in the air. At least yesterday. Today is quite nice. They’re comfy pants, borderline loungewear. Kept the tags on in case I get disapproving looks at work. Less than $20 from Walmart. Oh finally made it to Walmart. Been so long. Got some new sauces to try in Crockpot.

Other news. Grr… thinking more about leaving work in March. Couple different ideas swirling of what to do. Lounge around or do some volunteer work. Ugh, kind of don’t want to move. But kind of do.

Wed, Dec 5-Been feeling really settled the last couple days maybe even the last week. I might even round settled up to happy. I think because it’s the end of the year and there aren't really any big decisions to make. All I really have to do is...well nothing. All my angst for trying to do something big, or meaningful, or worthwhile in 2019 has unexpectedly been pushed to the side.

Yesterday I stopped at the Asian market and bought Japanese potatoes, cassava, and mango. Mangoes were out of season but I bought them anyway. So what. I don’t know what I feel, it’s been awhile since I’ve felt such little angst. Just yesterday I had a few hours of not-this-again with Aunty MERJ’s finance. New bills popped up from over a year ago and she’s still withdrawing cash to “buy her things.” Whatever.

For awhile I was trying to figure out what great thing I can do by my 35th birthday in 3 months. I don't know what that great thing is, but it certainly is NOT: buying a new house; FIRE; moving; getting a new job; waking up with a life-purpose. Whatever.

Right now I just feel acceptance. I got through 2018 hemming and hawing all the way. I have a preliminary budget for 2019. Finances were sort of the least of my worries, so I’m grateful for that. If something expensive popped up that I could convince myself I wanted, I would buy it.

While I have no grand plans, I am comforted by the fact that I have enough. I’ve given myself permission to take off time from work, and up to 1 year can be funded without much planning. That is comforting. I keep getting stuck in the plans and trying to make that time off useful, but a quiet voice in my mind is telling me just to do it anyway, who cares? So what, it whispers. I can recover from a year… I think. But don’t think on it too long, the voice says, or you’ll never do it.

I guess this is my reckless/luxury purchase. One year of freedom from responsibility and structure. Yet I know it will surely add time to my ever changing FIRE date, but I’m so blinded by the instant pleasure I foresee, I can’t think straight.

Thu, Dec 6- I was happy just yesterday. Spent at least an hour making scratch notes of an escape. Made a 3 column chart comparing the English teaching programs in Spain, Japan, and Korea. Unfortunately none are leaving in March.

I know I’m a whole lot more convinced about leaving work sooner rather than later. One milestone I might hit is getting to 100k in investment, which if all goes well, I should hit by end of March 2019. That’s my birthday month. I’m turning 35. Perfect time to make a big move. Only thing is I hate spring and summer in NC. It’s hot and miserable and polleny. I can’t go out doors. I end up just being sick for 3 months. If I’m going to be under the weather, might as well get paid.

Ideally, I would want to start my break in October if I’m going to be in NC. Then I think, why waste my free time staying in a place I don’t particularly care for. The answer is: because I’m here right now.

And so I’m back in the loop of trying to plot the ideal getaway. To escape the loop, my brain just tells me to cut it out and do something already! So there you have it. Another mental unending loop in the life of a single girl.

Fri, Dec 7 - Oh Glorious Friday! It’s 2p right now and it’s been a pretty great day so far. All is good again. Did not enjoy waking up earlier to go to dentist appointment, but took a nice warm shower and washed my hair. So fresh and so clean! No cavities and hygienist didn’t even have to do much scraping. They must’ve had a bad week at the dental practice because they kept praising me on my dental hygiene which in my opinion is pretty haphazard at best (I only brush on the weekdays…shhhhh).

Read some blog posts last night on the Spanish government English teaching program. So far it’s a front runner for what I am looking for, namely a small workload.

My new life plan:
Work till Sept 30, 2019.
Break from Oct 1, 2019 to March 31, 2020.
Work from April 1, 2020 until Aug 31, 2020 (tentative because not sure how to swing that).
Sept 1, 2020 Leave for Spanish English teaching job.

The applications for teaching in Spain in 2019 haven’t closed yet, but I do want to have my time off in the fall. Just a nice cozy fall before a big adventure is what I’m picturing. I don’t particularly enjoy spring/summer in NC so I’d rather just work and have them pay for air conditioning all day. Plus, Brain is telling me to save just a bit more money. For now that seems to make sense.

Had an interviewee sit with me at work today. Made me remember that my job is a pretty sweet gig. I don’t know why I give such a fuss about coming here everyday.

Also a quick chat with my dental hygienist, who incidentally is also from California, got me thinking that maybe my time in California is really done (for now). It really would be expensive to live on my own. And it really would be me starting all over again. Did I love California that much to do that? In this moment, no. I still have Missoula, MT in the back of my mind though.

11 Months of Income and Expenses in 2018

Well, if you knew me in real life, you would know sometimes I get really excited and can't contain it. Some might call this anxiousness. Potato, potahto. Anyway, I've been perusing my income and expenses and I just can't wait the two weeks for December to end to have a more complete picture of my income and expenses for the year.

I've also been sick for a week with little else to do other than blink and breathe, and I want to knock out some of these updates before my scheduled vacation days next week. So I'm cheating a little bit.

Thus, I bring you a sneak peek at my income and expenses for 2018! Check out how the single girl did, and tell me your thoughts. Remember this is only eleven months of expenses and income (Jan to Nov), but with only two weeks of the year left, I don't expect much to change unless my body or my car dies. God forbid.

Income

Here's a screenshot from Google Sheets of my income for 11.5 months. My first of two December paychecks is included just to keep it confusing.

My Paycheck is from my full-time call center job. Paycheck is sans 401k contributions and after tax. As you can see it varies because we get paid from the 1st to the 15th and then the 16th to the 31st. So sometimes, that's a lot of hours, sometimes it's just 80 hours. Bonus is annually based on secret metrics. Refunds are for things I return to the store after I buy them and realize I didn't actually need to buy that. Thank you generous return policies. Side hustle is my foray into the side hustling so common in the personal finance (PF) blogosphere. Let me tell you, I didn't love it.

As you can see, I started out doing Roth 401k contributions, then after immersing myself in the PF blogosphere I went with traditional 401k contributions. The conventional wisdom is to go with traditional if you think your tax rate will be lower in retirement anyway.

YTD Total Income (incl 401k contributions): $72,848

Expenses

Here's a screenshot from my spreadsheet. As I got through the narrative, I realized a couple expenses were left off and were subsequently updated. So some totals may differ from the screenshot. That's what happens when you have a human doing a robot's job.

I love it too when bloggers include blurry images...

A close-up of totals, YTD, Jan to Nov 2018.

Total
Aunty MERJ	$5,251
Debt	$6,835
Education	$0
Entertainment	$320
Everyday	$2,795
Gifts/Tithe	$106
Health/medical	$2,037
Home	$11,175
Insurance	$0
Savings/Investing	$39,287
Technology	$280
Transportation	$1,308
Travel	$520
Utilities	$424
Other	$148

YTD Total Expenses = $70, 485

YTD Total Expenses - Savings = $31,198

The Breakdown

Aunty MERJ: $5,251

Expenses for Aunty MERJ I count toward my tithe. I don't belong to a particular church, but I still tithe in terms of trying to give away 10% of my spending budget. For 2018, my spending budget was estimated to be $30,000, so 10% of that would be $3,000. I went a bit over with Aunty MERJ as her health rapidly declined and took her mood with it.

These expenses included visits to Florida and paying Aunty MERJ's rent while I got a handle on her finances.

Debt: $6,835

My whopping $300,000 student loan debt. I sacrilegiously have chosen not to pay off this debt. I know, I know. I am on income-based repayment for the next 25 years.

Entertainment: $320

This was one fitness class ($88), tickets to the state fair ($14), and three months of cable ($43/mon). Yes, I know. I still have cable. Last year I was spending $90/mon on cable though, so this is an improvement. My hack was using the DirecTV Now app vs regular Time Warner cable through a cord. DirecTV Now app is loaded on the Roku stick so you can still watch TV on the big screen vs a laptop. And I still get the same channels. A good binge watch + yummy snacks = favorite single girl pastime.

Everyday: $2,795

These expenses include Groceries, Restaurants, and Personal Supplies. On average, I seem to spend about $250/mon in this category as a whole. That's pretty good considering I budgeted $200/mon just on Groceries alone. For an itemized breakdown, in the last 11 months, I spent $1,281 on Groceries for one single girl, and $868 on Restaurants. Monthly, that's an average of about $117/mon on Groceries and about $79/mon on Restaurants. Not bad!

Gifts/Tithe: $106

I gave some money to my other aunt who helped me out during my surgery. My little cousins were going to prom and wanted to buy prom tickets.

Health/ Medical: $2,037

This category was a stunner this year. I had leftover dental work from 2017 that needed to be completed. I also had surgery. This is with health insurance. But, I thank God anyway. This year was a year of ailments from the root canal, to the surgery, to back and tailbone pain to recurring respiratory distress. As I type this I am hacking my life away with acute bronchitis - a single girl first. I don't know what's going on. Is this what 35 has in store for me?

Home: $11,175

No real surprises here. My rent went up but overall with utilities I stay around $1,000/mon to house myself. As an aside, there is a new mattress ($708) factored into this total as well. Continuing, I have considered home ownership but I can't afford anything where I currently live and I'm not ready to give up my pretty easy commute. I know- another blasphemous proposition for the single girl. Plus, if I'm honest, the numbers didn't work for me without a long term plan to stay in the area. It would take five to seven years to break even and that's with moving 1 hour away.

Savings/Investing: $39,287 (really about $36,287)

This is my first year actively investing, and by actively I mean fully contributing to my employer's 401k plan and opening my first brokerage account. After much deliberation, I decided to go traditional on the 401k. No real rhyme or reason in the end. The first blogger I read did it, so I did it too. Plus it keeps my adjusted gross income down for my income based student loan repayment. My savings goal for the year was $37,000 and I'm just about there. Thank the Lord! The $3,000 difference is because some of that was money I earned in 2017 that was hanging out in my checking and savings while I got comfortable with this whole financial independence thing. So far, so meh. More on that later...

Technology: $280

This is a few false starts with the blog mainly. Most of this was refunded just not captured in the way I charted my expenses for this category.

Transportation: $1,308

This was the category I was most looking forward to. I didn't have a clear picture of what it costs to own a car each year after monthly payments are done. Now I have some idea. I drive a 2007 Honda that I bought new, and I'm curious to see how long I will be able to drive it. It has close to 150,000 miles and still runs fine. When it's time for my next car, it will be nice to have some accounting of the true cost of owning a car.

This category captured: fuel, insurance, license/registration, and maintenance. On average, this year I spent about $42/mon in gas or $459 over the last eleven months. That's a little high attributable to more fill-ups the four months I was side-hustling. In fact during four non-hustling months, I spent less than $25/mon on gas! I spent $708 on car insurance this year, and a whopping $142 for registration and inspection. I still have some outstanding maintenance, but only time will tell if I get to it in the next two weeks.

Travel: $520

Ahoy! Single girl, you didn't go anywhere?! Yes, that's right. This is the cost of my staycations for the year. Wait, what? Yes, well in May I spent $50 in gas to go to Maryland to see my cousins graduate. In August, I had some serious back pain and spent a weekend in a hotel and called it a writer's retreat. And in September, I bought some delicious food and holed up in my apartment for the week. It was berry niiiice.

Utilities: $424

This is my eleven month total for power. Water and internet is paid to my apartment complex with my rent check. Which averages about $38/mon but I carry a credit on that account because I prepay.

Other: $148

This is mostly the cost to renew my professional license. Work pays for continuing education courses, of which we have to have 15 hours or so. Then at the end of the year we certify we took those courses and didn't do anything bad, then we get a new license and carry on with our lives. It's a nice life.

That's pretty much it. I enjoyed this conversation a lot more than my updates with graphs. They're pretty, but boring. Stay tuned for the Q4 financial update with pictures and the remainder of December 2018 expenses and income.

My Early Retirement Journey on MikedUp Blog

My Early Retirement Journey interviewed on MikedUp Blog

Single Girl shares her wins and losses on MikedUp Blog.

Head on over to check it out. You don't want to miss this!

About MikedUp Blog's Wins and Losses Series:

MikedUp Blog’s Wins and Losses Series features interviews of generous participants about four of the best and worst moments of their life. The point? To learn from the past so that we can improve in the future!

Head on over to check out My Early Retirement Journey's feature.

Single Girl On Holiday for the Holidays!

The Single Girl is on holiday for the holidays (read: watching Christmas movies and eating festive snacks). Feel free to subscribe in any of the many boxes to be notified of the freshest life and money updates sure to come in 2019! In the meantime, please enjoy these top ten posts from 2018.

Sabbatical 2020: In Which I Take Back My Life

Why Yes, This Is My $300,000 Student Loan Repayment Plan: REPAYE 2018

How Being A Victim of Identity Theft Helped Me Take Control of My Finances and Pay Off $30,000 of Debt in 2 Years

List of Single Girl Money Bloggers

Review | 3 Free Spreadsheets You Might Want To Try

Why I Love My Roku So Much! (Cable-whathat?)

Single Girl Life | My Week Ending Sep 28, 2018: Regrets, Resignation, Murphy Brown

Sunday Funnies | Life Before and After Blogging

A Bajillion Tiny Little Indisputable Facts About Life In Your 30s

Single Girl Life | My Week Ending Oct 5, 2018: Meaningful Work, Making Money, Missoula

Bonus. My 5 Favorite Posts You Need to Read Today

How To Recognize Your Privilege: A Beginner's Guide for White Men

10 Ways To Tell You Have Impostor Syndrome (and what to do about it)

5 Unexpected Lessons from Freeform's The Bold Type

Single Girl Review | A2 Milk and My Lactose Intolerance Journey

Sunday Funnies | Normal Nancy Meets I-Love-It-Lucy!

9 Recurring Monday Morning Thoughts

What’s surprising to me is how eventhough I have the same thoughts every Monday they still present themselves as new. And I still react to them as though it’s the first time I’ve encountered them. I’m still just as distressed and sad and bewildered and lost and upset- all the feels- every Monday morning. Why is this is my life? I know I eventually get over it. I know the questions are rhetorical. And worst of all I know how far away my FIRE date is!

Sometimes it helps to unburden myself of my thoughts by expressing them, even virtually into the void. I hope too just by looking at this from time to time I can realize how regular and ridiculous these thoughts are and continue to keep swimming.

Without further ado, here are my thoughts on repeat in my mental playlist every Monday.

#1 I don’t want to go work today.

#2 I’d rather be dead.

#3 I don’t want to be a non-white-man in America anymore.

#4 Can I call in sick?

#5 I’m quitting in 2 weeks.

#6 I should give it all up and move to Europe.

#7 I should give it all up and be a lady of leisure for an indeterminate amount of time. To heck with personal finance goals!

#8 Why was I born?

#9 Why did my parents have me if they can’t provide for me (a life of leisure)?

#10 Bonus. How do people do this everyday? For 30+ years?

Single Girl Life | My Week Ending Nov 2, 2018: Why is it so hard to be a human?!

Welcome back to My Early Retirement Journey. In case you're just joining us, here's a little bit about me. I am a single 30-something, openly Christian, hesitantly immigrant-y, human woman. I enjoy watching TV while eating takeout, and I want to retire early. I currently work as a consultant in a tele-health call center making around $40/hr. I started my professional life in 2015 at the ripe ole age of 31 after a few false starts. I spent 2016 paying off about $10,000 worth of credit card debt. I spent 2017 paying off about $20,000 in private student loans; I still have about $300,000 in federal student loans for which I am currently on an income-based repayment plan for the next 25 years, give or take. I started really getting into savings and investing late 2017 when I stumbled upon the FIRE (financial independence, retire early) community. In 2018, I made the decision to try to save for a sabbatical and maybe if all goes well continue the journey to early retirement. Along this journey, I give weekly more personal than finance updates just like this one. Come along with me, I urge you!

My week

Monday – Headache as soon as woke up. Dreams of being rich and silver spoon fed. Maybe my dream is to just live a year without worrying about work or money. Is that ok? Haven’t even had a chance to try out my new name. Looked up Japan again, maybe the JET program. But apparently there’s a lot of mold in Japan. Island weather?

Lightbulb moment: Duh! My big dream is to do nothing! Why has it taken me so long to say that. I felt like a failure. I felt bad that I didn’t have this beautiful family and beautiful house to spend time with and in if I were to quit work. I had to justify my own dream.

No, ma'm. My dream is to live a lackadaisical existence! To move and groove on my own time with my own dime. I spent so much of my youth having to be helpful so someone would keep me and take care of me.

From where I stand, there isn’t some higher purpose for my life at this moment. I feel no real calling on my life. Or if it’s there maybe I’m ignoring it? See there I go again.

I felt like a failure. I felt a little crazy like there was something wrong with me. I thought I needed to be committed for mental illness because I don’t want to do anything or help anyone. But I’m fine! This is what I have always wanted, much the way people say about motherhood or parenthood. NO, REALLY. THIS IS ALL I’VE WANTED.

Tuesday – My NEW life plan makes me smile. Makes me giddy. Makes me walk with a skip in my step! I really think I’m going to do it. Part of me kind of wants an audience, so I might document it. Just for all the aimless wanderers out there – there is a space for you too. After close to 35 years of searching for a purpose and searching for meaning without success, I’m just going to give up the ghost. I can die later (that's always Plan E right?), but for a year I can be worry free.

No, I’m not quitting to work on my novel or turn this blog into a profit machine. No, I’m not quitting to meditate and eat veggies and go to church and do mission work or build a school. Nope. I mean those things might be nice. But I’m not doing that. I’m living my aimless purposeless existence. I’m embracing my life more ordinary. I’m tired of feeling bad about it and doing nothing. Now I’m doing nothing and feeling good. Rocket science right? I googled all the things. And skimmed all the Bible passages. I’ve come up empty, world. Empty! The mini summits I had with my honest friends all lead to the same thing – no one (we know anyway) is really doing anything with their lives. People assign their own meaning to their life. The typical case is work, kids, and family. Ok, and if you don’t have those things or those things don’t add value to your life, then what? Nothing! Literally. I have yet to combust and die because while work serves a financial purpose (of which I am grateful), it and kids and family don’t get me out of bed in the morning.

Like, why did I need permission to live my own life. The theme is central -we all have this one life, but it was as though I was standing on the sidelines for someone to tag me in. I realized three years ago that I was a side kick in my own life and I sought to change that. When I realized I didn’t get far down that road, I felt like a failure.

But maybe I'm not. The languid lifestyle is the life for me.

I’m not depressed. I’m not suicidal! I’m not broken or hopeless (but if you are, seek help, there are numbers for you to call). There's nothing wrong with me. I celebrate my truth that I enjoy doing nothing.

I’m not any more aimless than those living pre-fab lives.

I watch House Hunters nightly and so many want so badly for their houses to be interesting, full of character, but is that because of the bland pre-fabness of everyday life.

I’m not any more or less original then, I guess.

Wednesday - Been waking up so happy this week. And a bit productive too. Made single girl crockpot chili last night. Well I prepped it and put it in the crockpot this morning so I can come home to a nice warm bowl of chili on a breezy Halloween evening. I heart October in North Carolina! Got lots of candy and some things to watch tonight.

Thursday – Aunty MERJ having hearth catheterization +/- a stent placed. She withdrew all the money out of her account earlier this week. There is about $14 left. There goes my plans of paying myself back the four or five months of rent I had fronted. Oh well. It took five months of me helping her out to save about $1400 in her account and she withdrew $1200 in one month. Maybe she thought she was dying. Who can say.

Weird feelings at work. I hope nothing comes of it. Approached again about taking more of a leadership role for same pay. I don’t mind the work if I thought it would lead to more pay, but it doesn’t at least not right away. And I’d be working with part of the leadership team I don’t particularly care for (so much drama, fan fare and attention-seeking behavior #notaboutthatlife). Lots of married women who are used to having something to say to someone about everything! Everything! All. Day. Overall not taking on more responsibility probably seems a little short sighted from the outside looking in, but I’m cautious lately with my emotional state. I really need to churn out my love-hate post about my job. Hate is a strong word. I don’t hate my job.

New life motto: If it makes your life easier or simpler, say yes.

Friday - I’m so glad you’re here. Why is it so hard to be a human?! This week was actually not that bad. Praise the Lord I am here to talk about it. My inner demons haunt me.

And this blogging thing. Sucks up my time and energy. But when I try blogging daily, Brain says do it weekly. When I try weekly, Brain says do it monthly. When I try to take a break, I have now been checking blog email and blog site before and after work; posting and commenting; and checking blog during the day. The only thing I’m not doing is engaging in FB and Twitter and Pinterest. I had planned to take some time off since late October. But I just found different things to do; example I spent over an hour the other day just playing with the wording in my About Me blurb (below).

Made crockpot chili earlier this week. It’s pretty mediocre. And I was so excited and proud of myself for making it. That's all folks!

TV this week: Sierra Burgess is a Loser, Very Cavallari
Takeout this week: $9 Peruvian

Your turn

How was your week? What did you do? See? Feel? Think? Decide? How's your life journey in general?

Related Content:

Last week's update

And the week before that

My 30 Day Gluten Free Journey

For the month of September I went gluten free. If you're just joining us, 2018 has been a year of health issues for the single girl. I had surgery in March 2018 and it has not healed well. Specifically I had granulation tissue after my wound was supposed to be done healing. To help combat this, I decided to go gluten free. Wait, what? I know, hang in there, there's a rhythm to my madness.

What is granulation tissue?

In my case it was new vascular tissue in granular form on the healing surface of a wound. It can be associated with a non-healing wound.

What does gluten have to do with granulation tissue?

My story

So here's the deal. As I said, my surgery was in March 2018. At my six-week follow-up, which ended up being a three month follow-up because I was working two jobs, my doctor told me I had granulation tissue. She wasn't too alarmed, so I wasn't either. She applied some silver nitrate and told me to return in a month.

A month later I returned. Now it's July. Same thing. Lay back and spread 'em. Sizzle, sizzle with the silver nitrate. Come back in a month.

A month later I returned. Now it's August. Same thing. I'm sure I cried during at least one of these appointments. The granulation tissue was still there! At this appointment, she happened to mention that my immune system was sill trying to protect me. Aha! A light bulb went on.

Gluten and granulation tissue

So granulation tissue to me is like a part of the inflammatory process that isn't cooperating. Wounds are supposed to heal. When treated well, the body is a well oiled machine. When she mentioned my immune system kind of doing more than it needed to (doing the most! as the young kids say), it triggered a memory. I had heard a couple anecdotes from people I know about gluten and a disease called Hashimoto's. It's a type of auto-immune process that leads to disease. Because gluten is sometimes recognized by the body as an antigen (basically an intruder it tries to rid itself of), some osteopaths have tried to mitigate the condition with a gluten free diet with intermittent success.

I normally have a hard time digesting gluten anyway. Most people do, they just don't know it. It's why baby food is mostly rice based. Gluten is freaking hard to digest. If I eat pizza or sub sandwiches more than three days in a row, I feel as though I'm going to die from the gas, bloating, and constipation. It just sticks around and it makes me feel icky.

I digress. So having heard that gluten is sometimes recognized as an antigen by the body, I thought why not try life without it. Not eating bread hasn't killed anyone that I know of. Without my doctor's instruction, I decided to just stop eating gluten until the next sizzle and poke visit. I was getting tired of using my vacation days for these appointments with a $40 copay to boot!

My 30 day gluten free diet

What the heck did I eat, you might ask. All sorts. It wasn't that hard in terms of missing out because pizza and sandwiches aren't my favorite foods. The hardest part was that wheat is in most convenience foods so things like crackers, which were a staple in my lunch box, and fast food burgers, which have supplemented many a single girl lunch, were no longer an option. Here's what I did eat.

Week 1

What I ate: potatoes, li'l smokies, more potatoes, peanuts, pistachios, bananas, oatmeal, apple sauce, refried beans and nachos, rice with corned beef, rice with sardines, rice with salt, rice with egg, gorged on Unreal chocolates because my sweet tooth could not be satisfied without my nightly snack of packaged cookies

Biggest thing I missed: snack food!

Overall: I was so hungry! But I had some great potty time. It was more difficult to snack or indulge in convenience foods as my work lunch go-tos were fast food burgers, Subway, KFC Chicken Littles, or even hummus and pita at the Middle Eastern place around the corner.

Week 2

Breakfast: oatmeal, nuts, cantaloupe, bananas

Lunch/Supper/Dinner: Hunan shrimp and rice, chocolates, rice and onions, majadara

Overall: I started to get more organized with the eating once I realized some of my go-to fast food options were out. I ate Chinese take out two or three times during the week. I started to get sick of it, and my gut wasn't having the last bit. I think soy sauce probably has gluten in it, but my body didn't complain too much. And I actually didn't realize it until now.

Week 3

Breakfast: nuts, dry cereal, banana rice bread

Supper: rice and chicken, Kind Bars, fruits (grapefruit, cantaloupe, grapes)

Overall: I found I was hungrier more. I didn’t stay full as long. I woke up hungry and was generally hungrier throughout the day even though I was snacking more. Overall, I was snackier. I just couldn’t get full on rice and potatoes. To sustain a gluten free diet, I suspect I would have to train my stomach to recognize satisfaction from hunger rather than that feeling of fullness. I guess that’s why they call the bread basket you get at restaurants fillers.

The banana rice bread was my favorite friend. Here's the recipe, if you're curious:

Recipe

4 brown bananas

2 eggs

1/2 cup vegetable oil

1/4 cup water

1 teaspoon vanilla

1 cup cream of rice

1/4 cup sugar

1/2 teaspoon salt

3/4 tsp teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon baking powder

1/2 tsp cinnamon

1 tsp coffee

1/4 tsp nutmeg

1 tsp fresh ginger (1/4 tsp ground ginger), optional

Muffins: Mix it all together. Bake 22 minutes at 375*F or until dark brown.

Week 4

Breakfast: peanuts and grapefruit

Lunch: popcorn, rice cakes and peanut butter, Kind bars

Dinner: rice and greens, more banana rice bread muffins

Overall: I was running out of ideas.

The Results

For the diet itself, with limited food options, namely Chinese or Mediterranean vegan rice, I found myself eating out less at lunch. I just went with smaller meals and packaged snacks and bars. Or just got tired of trying to figure out what to eat and just waited for the next meal time.

As for my health, my granulation tissue did in fact heal! It took six months and a radical diet, but heal it did! Praise be! I went to my last visit at the end of September. My doctor was unimpressed by the strategy I tried when I told her. I’m guessing she just thought I was another backseat-Google-doctor whacko. But hey, she said my immune system was being overprotective. So I took it out of overdrive. I didn't die and my immune system is back to normal. I call it a win for the single girl! Why, yes, I would like to keep that $40 copay for my chocolate and cable habit. Thank you very much!

Your turn

You ever get into fad diet trends?

Single Girl Life | My Week Ending Oct 26, 2018: I wish I knew how to quit you!

My week

This week (Saturday to Thursday) I had four days off from work, but two days into it I realized I should probably go into work and try to save some vacation days for next year. I made it half a day and went back home. But the days I had off were so glorious and refreshing.

Humans! If you haven’t gotten into Lifetime’s You, you are seriously missing out! It’s soo good in the creepy stalkery romantic way! TV is good again. Also did a 28 episode binge watch of Netflix’s Terrace House. Still good. Oh to be a twenty-something model living in Japan looking for love! Maybe in my next life?

I didn’t touch my laptop or iPAD for the first part of my break and I finally felt like I was recharging. To think that blogging is keeping me from fully unwinding on weekends and weeknights makes me very sad. So in my languid stupor, I decided to maybe take some time away from blogging. SAD FM. It’s been touch and go. I have a few solid posts coming up and I don’t want to lose momentum. But I really relished my free time again! What is a single girl to do?

Wednesday – This was the day I attempted to go back to work after a four day holiday. I realized it was on my way to work that I get the most down. At home, I felt fine about the thought of going in to work. Then on the drive in what popped into my head was the quote ‘the life you save may be your own.’ Maybe this is all I will be able to do in my lifetime. Is this the plight of being someone one like me (a hyphenated-American)? Maybe I won’t be able to retire in my 30s or early 40s but maybe I can be happier living elsewhere? Suddenly with that as an objective, two more years seemed doable. I left work after four hours.

Friday – Remember Brokeback Mountain's "I wish I knew how to quit you."

Just when I was getting used to the idea of taking some time away from ye olde blog, I got featured on TFD (again!)! That’s three features within about a week. I am elated! I think I submitted my posts for each of these honorable mentions but it’s still been a grand week in single girl land! No, nothing Richter scale level has happened in terms of income or traffic, but it feels really good for the creative writer in me. Someone of their own volition is reading something I wrote when just yesterday I was just an anonymous troll binge watching tv and eating cookies (I still do that btw).

I don’t hate blogging, and I definitely don’t hate writing. I just can’t find a way to do it and other things. I try to set time limits, but when I get a little bit bored (watching my television shows) I say to myself oh I’ll just get online for 30 minutes. Thirty minutes ALWAYS turns into 3 hours or more. Then there goes my down time on weeknights and weekends. How do y’all strike a balance especially with no monetary gain? Do I just change my mindset on measurable outcomes? But I am so heavily motivated by money!

I didn’t even intend to post this update this week, but I was just overcome with gratitude and warm fuzzies, I had to share with my virtual friends!

My latest wins (just pretend these are photos of my cute kids, and take a gander):

Sabbatical 2020: In Which I Take Back My Life (featured in Rockstar Finance newsletter)

5 Unexpected Lessons from Freeform's The Bold Type (featured on WomenWhoMoney)

How Being A Victim of Identity Theft Helped Me Take Control of My Finances and Pay Off $30,000 of Debt in 2 Years (featured on The Financial Diet)

Also some really cool pins that I made (these are now taking me under an hour to make, save, compress, and attach, some in 15 minutes or less!) Pinterest - something else I unsuccessfully keep trying to spend less time doing...

TV this week: You, Terrace House: Boys and Girls in the City
Takeout this week: nada, lots of crockpotting

Your turn

How was your week? What did you do? See? Feel? Think? Decide? How's your life journey in general?

Follow/ Like/ Subscribe

Related Content:

Last week's update

And the week before that

How To Recognize Your Privilege: A Beginner's Guide for White Men

I find that many men of privilege often have a hard time accepting that fact. From what I've gathered, they seem to think unless there was an actual silver or platinum spoon in their mouth, they have in fact made their own way of their own accord. I scoff at you, I scoff.

Presented with such a dilemma, this single girl is happy to help for I am nothing if not resourceful. Thus this handy guide was born. Inspired by such works as The Cooper Review's wildly successful "How To Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings" and "Are You Arguing With a Bot," I dare not tread lightly.

Let me be the first to admit that all of us, myself included, constantly underestimate the power of positive role models or just the presence of positive people in our life even if they are not directly mentoring or parenting us. This is true even in adulthood.

My story

Cautionary tale. I tried dating at age twenty-seven even though it wasn't something I was particularly interested in because that's what people my age were doing. Nothing too terrible happened, but it was not really a worthwhile exercise for me. The primary reason I did it was because that's what everyone I knew was doing.

Similarly, I recognize one of the reasons I'm not happy in my current station in life is because none of the people around me are doing things I want to do be doing. The focus of women in their thirties in my immediate surrounding seems to solely be babies, husbands, and home ownership. It's annoying, but I'm at least old enough to recognize it.

Additionally, in said workplace, no one that looks like me, talks like me or acts like me is in any real position of power or influence. So, I go to work, do my job and intentionally or not distance myself and try to fly under the radar (my non-white-man manager even encouraged this). I work in constant fear of calling attention to myself or being labeled too different so as to make others uncomfortable. I don't want to make the "they" wonder why they even hired me in the first place. So now I'm called anti-social and labelled the one who likes to keep to herself. But I know first hand things or people who are too different from the "them" makes them uncomfortable. You've seen Big Brother or Survivor. You know who is always the first to get voted off the island. So this is my work day and I still have to do actual work.

A more positive example occurred just last month (Jul 2018). I stumbled upon The Cooper Review and loved the comics so much I wanted to make one. Then I thought hmmm that must be a white man; only white men make comics; I could never do that. Once I read the bio of the creator, I was like wait a minute. It's a woman (of color). If she can do it, I can totally do this! So I searched and searched until I found a user-friendly comic maker and I made my first comic ever in life, at age 34. Yes everything in this paragraph sounds absurd and perhaps a bit anachronistic, but it's true. That was my thought process in 2018 with three degrees living in America. The struggle is (still) real!

A comic is not even essential to my life. Imagine what it's like for young people coming up with a stumble from the start. So without further ado, here is the single girl's guide to identifying your privilege - for white men.

Identifying your privilege - a guide for white men

Scoring:

Yes = +1
No = 0

BASIC

#1 Were you born healthy in America?

#2 Are you able-bodied?

#3 Did you grow up in a home?

[If you were homeless, un-domiciled, in foster care, cared for by a guardian, i.e. the state (-1)]

#4 Did you have running water, enough heating and cooling, most of the time?

#5 Did you have at least one parent in the home?

#6 Was at least one parent a contributing member of society?

#7 Did you have at least one nutritious prepared meal a day, most days?

#8 Did you have a designated room in your house for you to sleep in?

#9 Was your sleeping room a safe space?

[If NO, (-1)]

#10 Did you have a school in your neighborhood?

#11 Did you have clean clothes to wear to school?

#12 Were you safe getting to and from school and while at school?

[If NO, (-1)]

#13 Was it easier for you just to graduate from high school because that's what most people you knew well did? Alternatively, did you attend an elementary, middle, or high school were more than 90% of students finished?

Read more: Poverty and You: How does your FIRE budget compare?

Scoring Results:

2+ : Check you privilege (Yes, Virginio, there really is some privilege there.)

ADVANCED

#14 Did you have a bike?

#15 Were your free activities the community pool, a safe park, or after school activities?

#16 Were you ever driven or accompanied to and from school by a parent?

#17 Did anyone in your household or someone you knew well actively read books or the newspaper or printed media? Were there any books in the home? Did you have easy access to books or printed media?

#18 Were your relationships with adults or other children safe and healthy?

[OR If you found yourself becoming involved in an inappropriate relationship out of fear or for the protection they afforded you, (-1)]

#19 Were you ever in a desirable neighborhood or establishment where most people looked like you?

#20 Did most of your teachers or people in positions of power or positive influence look like you?

#21 Did someone you knew well graduate college? Did they look like you?

#22 Did someone you knew well (or looked like you) have at least one career that wasn't a minimum wage job?

#23 Is it true that no one you knew well was ever incarcerated or had a criminal record?

#24 Is it true that no one you knew well was a teen mom, was dependent on public assistance, or had gang affiliations?

#25 Is it true that you never had opportunity to choose between committing a crime or going without a basic need like food or safe shelter?

[If NO, (-1)]

#26 Did the people in your life who made what you consider to be good choices look more like you?

#27 Is it true that no one has ever told you that someone like you can't do x, y, z?

Scoring Results:

3+ : Why are you not president? If you are not in a position of power or influence, you are not realizing your full potential privilege. Go forth, my son. The world awaits!

For the visually inclined, this single girl also created a quick reference guide.

Quick Reference Guide

Read more: The New Yorker on White Fragility

(9Sep2018, MERJ)

Single Girl Life | My Week Ending Oct 19, 2018: Mega Billion, Rollercoaster, Crockpot Pork

My week

Monday – Another manic Monday. These are the days where I try to remember to be grateful. Even though I did nothing of substance over the weekend, I still keep thinking of one-hundred other things I’d rather be doing than driving in to work today. Today was: buying some lottery tickets and getting a Tailwind subscription. I know this blog is not my ticket out just like winning the lottery is not my ticket out, but what else can I do?

Tuesday – So outing at the fair last night with my old classmate was a success. Primarily because I showed up and didn’t cancel. I got some insight into hospital staffing and the 7 on 7 off shift. I think I would definitely enjoy the scheduling but probably not benefit from the actual work as much as I thought knowing that I didn’t have to work that hard or deal with as much social politics if I stayed at my current job. It especially didn’t help that he’s not making that much more than me.

Other things. I feel assured that my decision to lean out of socializing was the right one, but also nice to know I haven’t missed much. While I did my social exit intentionally, most friendships did indeed fade for others after graduation. I’m not a huge fan of the random text, although I have been guilty of it.

I’m feeling more of a pull to home ownership. I’m approaching it now from a building equity standpoint. I attribute this new perspective to looking at other FIRE budgets where they list their home equity under assets. I think that might be a nice addition to my budget as long as I can stay within my current housing budget. Other things to consider is how this will work with my myriad workforce exit plans. Ultimately, how I see it now, I’m spending $12k a year on housing and I foresee the grind for at least 7 more years minimum, for $12k x 7 = -$84k… so if I come up with any number greater than -$84k in equity after 7 years, that will be a win. What do you think?

Wednesday – New life plan.

Um…resign in 1^st week of Jan 2019 (maybe 1^st week of march 2019).

Idk, the comfort I felt in committing to the grind just yesterday has been replaced with my desire to leave fueled by: ugh, I can’t afford a house I really want; and I really don’t want to work; and I want a break! My mind just won’t stop.

Blog discouraging. Someone reported my using my blog name as my real name on Facebook, not once but twice. Now I’m blocked unless I upload identification. Hard pass.

Think I’m going down to default of quarterly posts of financial updates as that’s where it’s had the most impact in my personal life. Goodbye weekly update (might do monthly single girl life updates…might not). No more Wed weeklys.

Really going to try to enjoy this cable more… at least until Christmas season is over… Idk. That is all for now. Mega Millions lottery frenzy at work. I love it!

Thursday – My mind is a blur.

Postponed a future guest post with a blogger I was interested in connecting with. Scheduled remainder of previously scheduled post to publish this month. Thinking of taking a hiatus from blog for 2 months. Rationale: this is the easiest thing I can take a break from since work is a bit more high stakes + emotional rollercoaster + lot of time with low tangible return (free therapy, I suppose). Was so sure about it Wednesday morning.

Then Wed afternoon I found 9 comments that were hidden in my trash folder! It was such a delight to find them, I got rejuvenated again!

Then I was tinkering with blog styling again this morning and got lost for a moment. I now feel I will be so lost without blogging things to tinker with.

Part of the reason for the hiatus is the hiccup with Facebook as I was just starting to get traction. 70 pageviews from them in one day! I get tired of the seemingly endless albeit small hurdles.

And I’ve been thinking of taking a break sometime in the early part of next year and I want to make sure it's for me and not me getting sucked into the FIRE life.

Friday - Spent two hours on grocery ($27) and buying lottery tickets for office pool yesterday. Ended up going to three stores to save maybe $3. Have to remember not to do that next time. What would have been a 45 minute excursion turned into 2 hours…to save $3. That was not a valuable use of my time.

So many questions swirling. I just decided to make it another post.

Then later tonight I realized my blog was featured on Rockstar Finance email newsletter as "Noteworthy."

I had 3 new comments this afternoon and 2 weren't even other bloggers! How about that! I felt so excited I literally didn't know what to do. I came home after work and went back to the grocery store. I cooked beef and broccoli for the first time and thought about turning that into a post. Then put some pork bbq in the Single Girl Crockpot for this weekend. And even bought chicken to try a new recipe tomorrow. I just felt like chopping something! Look at the single girl go!

And the guest post I had postponed just yesterday ... I suddenly felt a burst of energy and crafted a complete first draft. See what I mean about emotional rollercoaster...

TV this week: mostly just House Hunters and Cybil to fall asleep to (Oh, I saw someone I knew 10 years ago on House Hunters Intl this week!)
Takeout this week: $20 at the state fair!

Your turn

How was your week? What did you do? See? Feel? Think? Decide? How's your life journey in general?

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