a monday

 today is a monday where i felt a bit of trepidation checking my widget email. i'm not sure what that's about.

i think the more i vocalize my early retirement date, the more real it feels.

went to my first FI meetup in person

it was cool to talk about FIRE with these people

i will say, i am starting to feel that FU money feeling

it helps when the market goes up

i cycle through quite a range of emotions

there's some feeling of this will be the year the US turns into a communist country and all my accumulated wealth will be for nothing..

my neighbor hasn't been staying over...and i feel remarkably calm about it...i think my mind is pre-occupied with getting through these next 5 months..

just 5 months people...

i was really tied to the payout at j1, but as time goes on...i'm slowly letting it go...

because I can FI with or without it...that's probably a combination of having enough (or being comfortably deciding i have enough) and just market returns...

i totally forgot i was just continuing to see how long i can last

i forgot and got tied to a particular outcome

i bought my freedom a while ago...why was i still suffering?

humans....

i don't even know where my old notes are to myself...but they'd be fun to find...