so i hadn't been blogging as infrequently as i had before... haha.. but i'm back... i tried the youtube thing...and it was fun...but much like when i started my FIRE journey and this blog... i thought the masses would be crowding to hear what i had to say
and like the human i am..what a blow to the ego.. when that turned out not to be the case... i quite enjoyed the making of the videos and the coming up of ideas...but yesterday when i checked and one of my videos had 0 views... i was quite down...and it's so public so i HAVE to check (my brain says)... and we know that living life is a different experience for me than some
so i am committed to my mental health for the next year or so; so i won't delete the channel but i have one more fun post that i still have to schedule and then i'll take a break, perhaps forever... i'll probably send the password to another friend in case friend and i are no longer speaking whenever i decide to come back..
all in all you didn't miss much... just this incredibly monumental thing happened in my life (EARLY RETIREMENT!) and i wanted the whole world to celebrate with me...
anyway...life is going swimmingly well..i was finally able to reduce my lexapro dose back from 20 to 10mg... i felt overmedicated to put it simply. like it was like rebound anxiety...
anyway, it's been over a month and i'm fine..
at some point i probably need to make an effort to rebuild community or at least socialize....but luckily i have some pretty easy ways to go through the motions...when i'm ready...
right now, i'm sooo enjoying my alone time...so much reflection..
i do worry every now and then about not having a biopsy on the unspecified breast lump but i felt confident based on the images that it was similar to what i already have. but i'm happy to do that in 2027