101 Things You Will Encounter Your 1st Week Blogging....about FIRE or Personal Finance

So you followed your favorite blogger's advice (read: their affiliate's recommendation) and started your blog in 3 easy steps! Turns out they left out quite a few things. Here's 101 things you will encounter your first week of blogging about personal finance, FIRE, or your early retirement journey!

• Spam emails. Parvinder and Sunhil will email you about marketing strategies and offer to take your blog to the next level. You will get 6 to 8 emails a day from them.  Then James and William will email you with surprisingly the same offer. Don't be fooled it's still Parvinder and Sunhil. It will take Gmail about 13 days to realize this is spam.


• Robocalls. Parvinder and Sunhil didn't like that you didn't answer their emails. They sold your information to the top robocallers. You will get many offers for business opportunities and a few threats from the IRS. It's not the IRS; it's Parvinder and Sunhil trying to get your information. Don't give it to them.


• Wordpress. The 3 Easy Steps To Start A Blog your favorite blogger promised were just to take your money. Now you have to figure out Wordpress. There are so many buttons. It will take your Friday evening, most of your Saturday and all of your Sunday to post your first entry.


• Slow load time. You will wonder why your blog is so slow when you only have 6 entries? Next you'll ask when did 7 seconds to do anything start being considered slow?


• Marketing.  You wrote 6 amazing posts, you'll think, so why haven't you been featured on CNN Money? Why do you only have 50 page views total and 47 were when you were trying to figure out Wordpress?


• Adsense.  Why haven't they approved your account yet. The notice said a day or less. It's been 5. Maybe you should have considered Parvinder and Sunhil's offer after all.


• Pinterest. What is Pinterest? What does that have to do with blogging?

• Rockstar Directory. It's not an energy drink.


• Rockstar Forums. It's not enough to just be in the directory? What's a forum? Is it free? Will it make you famous? Just one forum post and your blog will explode overnight right?


• Cloudflare. You contacted Bluehost and to make your site load faster you have to upgrade your package. The tech support guy said your package was the "cheapest."  Is this one of those spend money to make money scenarios?  The forums said try Cloudflare. So you might try that.


• Stock photos. Where does everyone get all their artistic photos? It's so aesthetically pleasing. Do you have to hire a photographer? Is that more money to a blog that's already cost you $60 bucks on the first day?


• So many log-ins. You can't take anymore spam. You will have to open a 4th email address. (The first three are for your other lives.) Plus, you're obviously going to blow up in the blogosphere and your fans need to reach you.

 

•  What's a plug-in? Is it free? Do you have to create another log-in? You wonder how does everyone keep all these passwords straight?

• What is HTML code? Do you need a coder? Do you have to create another log-in?


• What's a widget? Is that the same as a plug-in? Is this Econ 101? I thought this was supposed to be 3 easy steps! How come your page won't load on your Ipad? Where did your menus go?


• Some say you need a newsletter? What that? What's an email list? How will that make you money? Will that make you money?


• You finished what you had to say in your first 6 posts. Now what?


• Now you need a disclaimer? But no one's reading any of your posts. Do you put that up before you get page views? Before you get ads?


• Are you supposed to read all these different Terms of Service?


• What's a name server? Why do you have to create another log-in to change it?


•  What's a gravatar? Another log-in? Is it free? Will Parvinder and Sunhil find me again?


• How do you edit your </header > ?


• What does Merge Top Menu mean? Do you have a top menu?


• What's a static home page? Do you want that? Is that what everyone else has?


• Why haven't you made any money yet? Wasn't this supposed to be passive income?


• Where did another Saturday go?


• How do you make a drop down menu? Should you pay to upgrade your theme?


•  Do you keep your name private? Should you use a pseudonym? Acronym?

• Do you share your net worth? Your income? Your expenses? Your FIRE date? Your FIRE number in dollars? Euros? Pounds? Canadian dollars?


• Is your site https? Does it need to be?


• Why haven't you made any money yet?


• Where did another Sunday go?


• What's a CDN Server? Do you need that?


• What is Pinterest again?


• Do you tell your friends? Family? If you don't tell anyone, how will people know your blog exists?


• Should you pay for some of these services? Do you need a virtual assistant?


• What is Blog Elite Academy?


• Do you need a web designer?

• Do you even know anything about finance? Do you need to do APA or AMA citations when you "borrow" from other people's posts?


• Is your blog just a listicle or roundup of other people's blogs? Should it be?


• What's your hook? Your niche? What's your voice? You must have had one...where'd it go?


• What's affiliate marketing? Do you need an ad network? How do you get one?


• Adsense, why do you still have no ads for me?


• How many pageviews should you have? It's been a week!


• What is SEO anyway? How do you get that? Do you need Parvinder and Sunhil for that?


• What is a WHOIS?  What is FinCon?


• What's my debt payoff story? My rags to riches tale? How frugal is too frugal?


• Is there something you can hack?


• Parvinder! Sunhil! Help!

Related Content:

• FIRE Lies and Half Truths: An Open Rant


• How To Stay Motivated Your 1st Month Blogging